|The White Asparagus Triangulation|
Season 2, Episode 9
November 24, 2008
"The Lizard-Spock Expansion"
"The Vartabedian Conundrum"
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Sheldon is concerned that Stephanie is the only girl Leonard has dated that he "finds tolerable". He tries to force himself into conversations with "urban slang" to "help" Leonard in the relationship with Stephanie, as "history suggests he will fail". Leonard attempts to get away from Sheldon by going to the movies with Stephanie, but Sheldon is able to follow them despite Leonard only leaving a note.
After believing that Leonard is losing Stephanie, he runs to Penny for advice. Penny, however, is of no help, so Sheldon runs to Wolowitz and Koothrappali, but all they give is, in Sheldon's words, either "apocalyptic genocide" or "go easy on the cologne". Sheldon once again runs to Penny, but she refuses to talk. Afterwards, Sheldon attempts to prove Leonard's physical superiority to Stephanie by having him open a jar of white asparagus. However, Leonard shatters the jar by accident and has to get stitches. Wondering why Leonard can't supposedly keep a date, Sheldon, remarks, "You seem like a perfectly pleasant person. I can't understand why women have such a hard time loving you."
Following the trip to the hospital, Leonard finds his Facebook status has been changed to "In a relationship". Leonard also finds the cause: Sheldon hacked his Facebook account, and Leonard therefore bans him from talking. It is then revealed that, in response, Stephanie has updated her own status to mirror Leonard's. Leonard comments that he now has a girlfriend. Sheldon closes the episode by bragging "If I am permitted to speak again, Dr. Sheldon Cooper for the win."
(Leonard left for the movies with Stephanie, leaving Sheldon with a note that he was going to the movies)
Sheldon: If you were trying to make it impossible to locate you, you couldn't have done a better job.
Leonard: Oh, clearly I could have.
Sheldon: So, the only advice you got for me is "apocalyptic genocide" and "Go easy on the cologne."
(After Leonard got stitches from Stephanie)
Sheldon: You seem like a perfectly pleasant person. I can't understand why women have such a hard time loving you.
Sheldon: If I am permitted to speak again, Dr. Sheldon Cooper for the win.
Stephanie: Hey! How's my big crybaby?
Leonard: I didn't cry
Stephanie: I'm just teasing you, but yeah you did.
"The Big Bang Theory is like a state-of-the-art ship being sailed in the wrong direction. The cast is strong, the writing can be excellent and is certainly creative. And yet the show’s priorities are all wrong and they are producing television which is a lot less good than it could be." - The TV Critic's Review
- Title Reference: The contents of the jar that Leonard breaks, as well as to the dysfunctional relationship "triangle" (Leonard - Stephanie - Sheldon) that features prominently throughout the episode.
- Chuck Lorre's vanity card 
- This episode was watched by 10.19 million people.
- Sheldon is right that a strawberry is not technically a fruit (derived from the ovary of a plant), but is rather an accessory fruit (derived from some tissue around the plant's ovary).
- Sheldon attempts to invoke "Starfleet General Order 104 Section A" to relieve Leonard of his command of his own relationship with Stephanie. This section has not been clearly spelled out in a Star Trek episode, though the two sections that follow it (B and C) have.
- Leonard's time periods have become a geometric progression expressible as . When substituted in, this shows that Howard's estimation of 20 minutes was correct (22 minutes, 30 seconds).
- Apparently Leonard frequently uses the password "Kal-El" which is Superman's real name.